A Healthy Mind Forgets

Someone I know frequently says "a healthy mind forgets". Does a healthy mind forget? We know it is healthy to forgive. Is it also also healthy to forget? For example, I somehow forget the hurtful actions of another who will repeat those actions. I got back into that situation and go through the same thing all over again. What's healthy about that. On another level this could be a way to avoid negative consequences when a duty or commitment is missed. "Sorry, I missed doing that. My healthy mind forgot." Your thoughts?

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  • hmmm, wish I could have seen the reply to me that was deleted.
  •  Agitated, I don't feel that way at all. Actually  I feel sorry for him.  The man that told me I was going to hell is one of the biggest backstabbers I've ever met. He turned in another guy for sleeping at work but he does it all the time.way more then any other by fall. If there is a Hell this dude got  a guaranteed seat.

     

     Sad thing is this kids are just as bad. My son has to deal with one of his bully sons.He don't pick on my son,my son  like his father can't walk by and let it happen he has to steep in and protect the weaker.  Got my son in trouble last year when he stopped this bully from beating up a weak skinny freashmen after school.Cops got called, I got called to the school where a policman told me this kid is always causeing problems. He even lit a kid on fire at a party,through everclear alcohol on a passed out a teenager and lit him up.Hurt the kid pretty badly.

     

     If I am wrong and their is a loving God I have no fear of being judged for what I've done on this earth. If God made me he made me this way and knows what it would take to make me a believer.

     

      

    Juanita said:

    Perhaps you would have felt less agitated if he had told you that God loves atheists.   Your going to hell is an unfortunate consequense of your not accepting His provision so you don't have to go there.  His provision, Jesus, is because he loves you, not because he hates you.
  • Perhaps you would have felt less agitated if he had told you that God loves atheists.   Your going to hell is an unfortunate consequense of your not accepting His provision so you don't have to go there.  His provision, Jesus, is because he loves you, not because he hates you.
  •  Hello Lisa,

     

     Nice topic,

     

     I also have to forget the wrongs done to me. I can't recall the times I've let a person's hurtful actions be aimed at me. I do it so others that can't hanndle it as well as I do don't get into the line of fire. What I really look for is an opportunity to help the person that seems to enjoy dishing out hurtful actions. Guilt is a strong tool. I've found at times this person does not even realize the pain they are causing.

     

     Last year I had a co-worker tell me that I was going to Hell when I die because God hates atheist.. I informed this guy about our company  Ethics hand book.That his telling me that made work a hostile work place and that it could cost him his job. I told him I liked him, respected his belief in God but work was not a good place for this to happen.

     

    I agree fully. A healthy mind must forget to stay healthy.

     

  • I just said to my sister...

     

    Imagine how much good would come if people would do two things...

     

    Say, "I am sorry."

     

    And, forgive.

  • The idea of completely forgetting something has happened as a sign of forgiveness may not always equate

    As an example, I watched the rape of my babysitter when I was young, by her father, who then turned and attempted to murder me. I have a friend whose face was partially blown off by the intentionally malicious act of another person. For both him and me it's not that we forget what happened to us because the evidence of those moments are forever etched in our bodies. What we do is remember in a different light -- one of gratitude that we're alive -- in the mindset of prayer for those who were so out of alignment with God's love that they did what they did -- one of asking God to utilize these experiences we had to bless the lives of others and ourselves -- one of asking for the pain of all people who suffer to be transformed into the power of God's healing touch.

    Have I forgiven the man who did what he did to me and his daughter? Yes, without equivocation because I have lovingly released him into God's care. Will those memories still come up for me? Yes. And when they do, I continually lay them at God's feet so that they might be consecrated for His purpose. My memory of those moments has, through God's work, been the source of tremendous compassion, healing, and service for me and others. If, in God's will, those memories disappear, I will be grateful (and they certainly have come up less and less over the years). But in the meantime, I am most grateful for the healing power of forgiveness that releases us (according to His timing) from the bondage of such moments and set us free to live lives of fullness and joy.

    It is not necessarily in forgetting that forgiveness takes place. Sometimes it is in remembering, but doing so in the context of God's loving grace.

    ~ Christopher
  • Also, the whole concept of burning bridges is something that I think is neeed.
    How can we really, truly walk in forgiveness if we are constantly remembering, thinkng about and dwelling about our past? If you forgive someone we should move on, forget about it and not let it be brought up again.

    Daniel Dykes said:
    Lisa,

    I do believe it's healthy to forget because when I think of how God forgives us, He says that He throws it as far as to the east as to the west and remembers it no more. This is powerful because as Christians we tend to hold grudges, which the Bible calls unforgiveness and bitterness. That is unhealthy. When we forgive that is a conscious decision of our own. Now I believe the only way that we are able to forget and be healthy is through casting our cares on Jesus and allowing Him to bring the restoration. The way I look at Christ is that He is our Great Physician that brings the healing of not just physical ailments but also of the hurtful words and actions that people do on a daily basis. Like you said it's not like putting yourself back into the boxing ring to get hit some more, but we are taking ourselves out of that condition and atmosphere. When we do this is when I believe we are truly operating in the love of Christ. Thank you Lisa for bringing this to the surface. It gives us something to ponder on and think of, what would Jesus do?
  • Our pastor just gave a wonderful message about forgiveness. In it he made a distinction between forgiving and forgetting. Forgiveness does not require that we forget, he explained. It requires that we release ourselves and the other person from the bondage and ties of expected repayment and turn that over to God. Through God's work in us, we gradually experience things differently and are healed from the wound over time (or in some cases very quickly).

    In fact, he went on to say, to forget that someone has violated your boundaries or your life in someway is not only unwise to pretend it didn't happen, but it also sets the other person up to re-commit the sin again because we are not acting in accordance with where they really are in their life right now. To gain trust, one must demonstrate trustworthiness. For us to grant trust where it has not been demonstrated is a set up (intentional or not).

    Bottom line: forgiveness allows us to release the person and the event into God's hands so that healing might begin for us... and if and when the other person is willing... for them as well. Does forgiveness mean that we do not hold ourselves and others accountable for our actions? No. Just the opposite. Out of love we are willing to hold ourselves and others accountable to God and to instill the proper boundaries in our life that keep us and others less likely to sin.

    Christopher
  • Deborah,
    God is always available to help although we may not know how to reach out and receive His help.
    Loving ones in the body qualified and available...? That depends on the part of the Christian body you belong too.

    What if "A healthy mind forgets" is said in the context of, "My healthy mind has forgoten the point you were trying to make in our conversation or email" ?
  • If we remember the act, have we truely forgiven. Some have said that we haven't. We are only human, so we must think in the way of the Spirit. Love the sinner and hate the sin. We can forgive and love the sinner. When it comes to the sin we must pray and ask God to help us forget. Everytime we remember something that has happened bad to us, we should just bind the thought up immediately and give it to Christ. I do think we should also have discernment when it come to the sinner. As we are ministering to them, we must make sure they have a sincere heart. Now for the ones that may hold something towards us, thinking they are in the right when we know it was wrong, we need God's help on this. Forgiveness maybe only a one way street in some cases. We still need to pray that God will open their eyes and soften their heart. We just need to take everything to God and He will help us to forgive and forget to the best of our abilities as humans. The Holy Spirit is our helper and we must lean on Him.

    Your sister in Christ,
    Dora
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